How can I ever understand.



This is a poem I wrote bout a lil girl who never knew she was dead.....Enjoy.


A little girl with an innocent heart
waiting by the door all day long
When is mummy going to come home?
Isn't it past my story and bed time?
Wouldn't I even brush my teeth
or get a good night kiss from her
How can I ever understand.

Why is daddy looking like that?
he only does that when my tummy hurts
and the doctors get to give me some pills
or every time Grandma's go to heaven
but I'm right here, beautifully dressed in white
and heaven is full of grandma's
How can I ever understand.

I heard the click of the door
as mummy drifted into the house
They hugged for so long
Mummy! My tiny heart called
Is it my birthday? I look like a princess
Why aren't you dressed like me.
How can I understand.

I reached but couldn't touch
Mummy has a red teary eyes
she only does that when she cuts onions
or when I sleep for such a long time
but there is no onions in the house
and I am right awake just beside her
How can I understand.

Couldn't they just see me
they act like I am not here
or is it a birthday surprise
but my birthday is in 3 months time
Why is Mummy clinging to a picture of me?
And Daddy patting her at the back
How can I understand.

I spoke but they were not listening
Maybe I am going to get a baby sister
and they wouldn't love me anymore
I ran upstairs to cry along with bonny
My room is gone! and even bonny isn't there
Where are my toys and my little cute bed
How can I ever understand.

I went out but Mummy wasn't there
and daddy's smell was gone
this doesn't look like our house
but like the heaven grand pa talked about
But I don't have white hairs and I can't be here
I didn't even tell mum and dad I was coming
How can I ever understand.

Mary’s Thoughts (inspired by Luke 1 vs 26 – 38)




Mary’s Thoughts


This wasn't written in the bible, it is just a glimpse of how I thought Mary would have felt at that time. Enjoy.



Of course I was scared out of my wits at first. Who wouldn’t have been? But, after the messenger left, I got this funny, peaceful feeling and, despite everything, that’s never totally gone. Not that I knew how it was going to turn out, mind: I’d no idea. I wasn’t educated, see. I didn’t understand what was going on – there’s still a lot I don’t get – and even all the clever teachers I’ve come across haven’t been able to explain exactly why it all happened like that. Why me? I wasn’t nothing special or anything; I didn’t deserve it more than anyone else. I didn’t deserve it at all! I’m just the same as you! And I wasn’t always obedient after-wards neither. Don’t think that. I didn’t always trust what God said, I’m sorry to say. But then being a pregnant, unmarried teenager in my village at that time just wasn’t on, you see…Well, you can imagine what the elders would have said! I was so scared! It doesn’t bear thinking about, that doesn’t….Without dear Joseph, I don’t know how I would have got through it. He was gentle and kind even before he knew the truth, but I don’t think even he would have married me if he hadn’t understood who the child really was….Such shame! Women didn’t never recover from it in those days!

As it was, it wasn’t easy in the village, I can tell you: all those quick, disapproving looks they thought I didn’t see; all that whispering. I’m sure some of them have gone to their graves thinking the worst of me. Well, there’s nothing I can do about that now. I’m just sorry for them, that they never knew who he really was; never knew him. That’s the greatest loss any of us could ever have. And I’m not saying that just ‘cos I held him in my arms first, saw those bright, all-knowing eyes staring out at me before anyone else did. He was precious to me - but then any mother’d say the same…But that wasn’t – isn’t - the whole story. What made knowing him so special was that I could tell he really understood me – and not just me, neither – right from the start. I truly think that he knew me – knows me – better than I know myself. I could read it in his eyes – oh – way before he could walk or talk…I know, I know! It doesn’t seem to make no sense! But that’s the way it was; the way it is. Thank God!

A letter to Santa




Dear Santa,

I’m writing to you just like every year
Always been good since the last time
You brought me gifts on your red deer
I left you no milk but some sweet lime
Do forgive me for this funny mistake
But I’m sure you loved the cheesecake


I don’t want a Barbie doll under my tree
Seeing I’m now grown to own a perfume
But I’m not asking for that or a new birdie
All I want this year is for a bridegroom
For cruel Miss Betsy living near the lake
So she can be nice to kids like small Jake

Hope my wishes are not getting too much
Since I still have some more things to ask
For the old lady at the gate of our church
Always carrying that broken yellow flask
Please send her some pretty shiny roses
So they could brighten her dirty blouses

I know I didn’t write something for myself
Because my wishes came true very early
You sent them through your little green elf
Who came together with a cute pink fairy
So my letter is for many living around me
That their Season be full of so much glee


Another year is almost gone..


Yeah Yeah, it's been quiet a very long time, been kinda busy after all. Busy enough for my blog you may ask but then I must say I have been too busy for even myself:)) I can't say I am too busy too eat though. Enough of the busy line...

So it's December again and truthfully I have been counting down to Xmas since the beginning of November.... (Typical me). Now it's just around the corner and the only early gift I seem to be getting is *NOSTALGIA* , 'neways I know its going to be fun even though exams are around the corner :( but it will soon be over and I hope it takes the cold with it.

I know you are definitely expecting me to write what I am thankful for again this year as usual, but truthfully this year has given me the best bitter sweet feeling(Hmn...contradictory I know). To be more frank , God gave me victory in several aspect of my life and I just cannot start writing the list of what I am thankful for right now...because I wouldn't stop writing till I grow Grey hairs.

Since another year is almost gone with 26 beautiful days to look forward to before 2011, I feel I should really plan for the New year,I have so many expectations and achievements in 2011...(I see it already). Don't worry I am not going to start making new year resolutions that people never keep but one things is for sure their are certain things that I have to make an effort to do this 3things this year..

1)I definitely have to decide whether I want to continue with the guitar or just give it out to someone...lol..it's begging to be played.

2)I have to change my laptop, the thing can really fry yam (Aba..3 yrs don waka) , yes I know I got an Ipad but an IPAD isn't a laptop(I better stop deceiving myself)

3)It's high time I threw caution to the wind and printed my Chapbook....Delayed too long!!!

That is that for that but for 2011 my number 1 goal is to grow in Christ and his love...I want my light to so SHINE...

Ok maybe I will just stop for now but I will definitely write to you soon...yes you...but first let me write my letter to Santa(You will be reading it soon)..


xoxo


My Fatherland


When I die let me buried
Only in that land I love
Amid the wide spread plain
Where termites live and own
Though with the blood of foes
Lying in that grave I’m home
Many would laugh at my plea
And wonder why I would seek
And long for all that seem lost
But while I fly to the sky
Below would I see my fatherland

Oh why shouldn’t I be buried
In that swamps where I grew up
Among children with no pants
Or even shoes to call their own
Where we slept on hard floors
Or tattered mats we call bed
Now I’m all grown and far off
I still want a feel of that all
To breathe in the dry air
Of a dusty harmattan wind
that sweeps around our huts.

LOVING YOUR BODY: SECRET TO LOOKING GOOD

How many times do you look in the mirror wishing you were slimmer, sexier or wishing you had a Miss. Universe kind of body ? To what extent are you willing to go to get a change to it? How do you really feel about your body?. These are questions that bothers one of every four people.

One of the secrets to beauty is taming your heart to love your body. Feeling indifferent to one’s own body is like settling for less. Every human should pay a special attention to his or her body because beauty no longer only lie in the eyes of the beholder but also in the physical appearance.

To some, their body needs so much work that they can less be bothered about their looks. Every woman needs a touch with beauty now and then and giving your body some love treats is a good way of starting off.

There are several ways to make your body feel loved. Eating healthy meals, exercise, Drinking water every day and making sure you moisturize your skin daily. These are just the few of among many.

Looking good is not related to pride in any way, in fact it embraces the true you and brings out the beauty. It is a sign that you care about what people see when they look at you, after all first impression either opens the door or closes it.
Beauty tips only work when you apply it while treating your body with its respect either physically or hygienically .

So many people ignore some parts of their body because it’s not just what they want. Just because you want a softer skin while your dry skin is so much work does not mean you should ignore. It could always get worse. What if that smaller eyes you wanted made you look like a comical painting or that slim body just doesn’t suit your face. Then what happens?

Everybody looks good in their own unique way, but the way we handle our body differs in every way. We should also keep it in mind that what suits body A might look alarming on Body B.

The only enemy to your body is yourself ,once you start loathing it then nothing feels good in it. Then you begin to see yourself as somebody that lacks beauty, whereas all that is lacking is just an awareness of one’s own ignorance towards your body.

Wearing the best make ups without feeling good in it takes the allure away. Looking good boost every one’s confidence. If loving one’s body brings an exotic touch to beauty, then I am so much crazy about mine.

What I am thankful for.

This was a thanksgiving note I put on my facebook, Just wanted to put it here too.



Although I knew how important it was to be thankful, I only learned a few days ago the significance of it. At first when I thought of writing the things I was thankful for, I thought I couldn't find two (especially when you are in a dark season of life). I challenged myself and, when I came to 50 things, I realized that I could keep on going! I learned a great lesson that day, and it was the beginning of changing my life too! I am going to be listing 50 things and people I am Thankful to God for in the year 2009. I challenge you too to start writing out 50 things that you are thankful for and look at them everyday for a while. It will change your life.

1. God: For his unconditional love ,Grace and favor.Without him I am nothing.

2. Jesus: who, when I see only one set of footprints, is carrying me through


3. Holy spirit: He is God's strength in me; He gives me strength through the Father to overcome
life's trials

4. My parents: I'm thankful to be the daughter of two very loving, supportive people. My parents enabled me to do and experience many things, regardless of how much they sometimes worried. They gave me everything they possibly could ... and even some things they probably couldn't.

5. My siblings: For being such a caring,loving and scolding brothers and sister,and just thinking of you each day keeps me alive


6. My beloved: You have been there for me through all,and you made sure I did things right and stuck to God,You encouraged me to be the best,You are more than just a friend,you are a brother

7. My best friend: You stuck by me even when odds told you to stop,you proved to me what friendship was about,you were not afraid to tell me when I looked my worse,you always wanted to know if I am still right with God.You are just like a brother.You are the best

8. My friends: If I named them all individually, from wonderful acquaintances to tried and true friends, I'd be writing a list of 100 right there. I don't have a large number of close friends, but I do know there are a lot of good people, near and far, who I can count on, who care about me, and who want only the best for me. I truly value my friends and will never have "enough" or too many.

9. The fellowship: with them its home far away from home.

10. Friends I've yet to make: I look forward to meeting them! Hmm, I wonder who they'll be.

11. Life: I love life, good and bad, each day is a gift

12. Laughter: It's just so healthy!

13. Faith: to persevere

14. Songs: the ones you hear that lift your spirit

15. My sight and hearing: so I can experience beauty around me

16. Clothes: to wear


17. Good health: Knock on wood. This should probably be way at the top of the list, but I'm really not writing this in any particular order. So far, I've never had any major--or really any--health issues. One can never know for sure what will happen in that regard, but I'm thankful that I've been blessed with good health.

18. Being debt-free: I don't owe anyone for anything, and that feels good.

19. Being financially secure: I am not rich (whatever that is, monetarily speaking), but I am comfortable and have what I need.

20. Accomplishing goals: To one degree or another, I tend to follow through on things. I thrive on having goals to strive for and am happy about the fact I've been able to achieve some of them. I like that I have "stick-to-itiveness."

21. Knowing when to quit: I like knowing that I'm able to walk away from things that don't make me happy or aren't satisfying. Sometimes it takes a while to come to terms with "quitting," but I'm glad I've had the guts to do it when it has really mattered

22. Being a Nigerian: Taking nothing away from any other country, I'm just being thankful for my own. It may not be perfect--what place is?--but I love it nonetheless.


23. Writing : The talent for writing God has blessed me with. I'm going to start picking up my pen more often; I want to write to glorify Him. I am not a professional but at least, when I really try I feel some joy in what I write. I'm happy I can express myself and my imagination that way. I may not be the best writer, and there's always plenty of room for improvement, but I do know I have some talent to build on.

24. Being a nice person: I'm hardly perfect, but it's good to know in my heart that I'm a kind person. I'd never intentionally hurt anyone. I don't believe in being mean. I hate to see anyone cry and love to see people smile. I may be a bit shy sometimes and not the best at socializing, but I genuinely appreciate and care about people and I am thankful for that.

25. The seasons: I love them all. Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter. There are so many wonderful, special things about each, no matter where I live or spend the time.

26. Hot showers: Need I explain? They're especially satisfying after a good workout

27. Chocolate: I love chocolate. Chocolate rules. I'm not picky.

28. Fridays: They always put a smile to your face after a whole week’s hard work

29. Facebook: I really never thought this would be on any list of things to be thankful for, but I truly am glad I joined. I've reconnected with old friends--some of whom are better friends now than ever before--and seen it bring together all this ,then I am thankful.

30. Teachers: Not an easy job for not enough pay. I'm especially thankful for some of the great ones I've had ... even though I can't remember all their names.

31. kindness of strangers: I love it when someone I don't know smiles at me or says or does something nice.

32. Memories: It's fun to reminisce.

33. My hair: Sometimes it doesn't cooperate, but I really do like it.

34. The bible: It really keeps me on track and molds my life.

35. Art: It doesn't matter if I personally like a piece of art or not. I'm just thankful that people create it. And when I do like it, it sure is nice to look at. Actually, art is worth looking at even if I don't like it.

36. The hard times: Because they've made me stronger and wiser, and the good times even better.

37. wonderful animals I've known: Besides my own special pets, I've had the pleasure of caring for and enjoying the company of many others. I'll never forget.

38. Great works of fiction: I really appreciate a good book that transports me to another world, even if the story takes place in the place I happen to be.

39. Free speech: Yes, I'm thankful for the Free Speech rights we still have remaining, because without them,many would have been arrested.

40. Ground: the one we walk on,I don think I can live with the thoughts of flying

41. Fresh snow: It's fun to wake up to blue skies after a blizzard, strap on my snowshoes, and walk on the white, frozen water. I love seeing all the critter prints and hearing nothing but the breeze, the birds and the sound of my own breathing.

42. Rainy days: I love knowing the world around me is getting watered. Rainy days are also a great excuse to curl up with a blanket and a good book.

43. Mother Nature: She's given us beautiful turquoise oceans, tumbling waterfalls, rainbows, rocky red cliffs and rolling, green fields. I'm still in awe whenever I catch a gorgeous sunset or come face-to-face with a snow-capped mountain. We all need to take better care of our planet.

44. The Internet: The Internet has opened so many doors for me in terms of my writing and meeting old friends

45. for the simple things in my life

46. A sense of humor

47. Today

48. Being me

49. For been able to give thanks

50. for inspiring me to make this list! That was fun and felt good, too.

Oh…..51

I'm glad I was able to come up with 50 things. :)

My childhood misconceptions!!!



Just some moments ago I was thinking about my childhood and some silly misconceptions I had as a child..Pretty sure everyone has one of that. I had loads of them. Here are some I can still remember and I can't stop laughing at my self now that I'm all grown up.

For some reason, I thought that the toilets in airplanes would need to be emptied in the air because it wouldn't have anywhere else to go. So I always don't want to stand directly under an airplane when watching, also one sunny day I heard an airplane passing overhead, and I was watching it fly over. My dad saw me and assumed I was looking at the sun, and he said,"Don't look at that, it will make you go blind. For over a year after that, I'd run for my life anytime I heard an airplane approaching.

I thought drinking and driving meant you couldn't drink anything, even water.

I also thought traffic lights were a tiny school for a bunch of really stupid people who didn't remember primary colors.

When I used to see the sign "No Littering #50 Fine" I thought that meant you
couldn't litter unless you were throwing away #50. I would often look around the
sign to see if I could spot any money

I used to think that the people in the TV could see me and I refused to get changed in front of it.

When my parents told me not to accept food from strangers I took it VERY seriously. My first day of primary 1,my mum gave me lunch money, and I was super excited all morning (I thought I was going to puke I was so excited.) I get to the lunch line and then am totally horrified when I realize that the lunch lady is a STRANGER. I sat at the table for like 15 minutes and wouldn't touch my food. Finally one of the teachers came over and saw that I wasn't eating (and just crying) and since they weren't a stranger I explained the situation. She still had to have me talk to my mum before I ate.

I thought that the car somehow knew where my parents wanted to drive, so it activated its turn signal accordingly. I thought it even knew when they wanted to change lanes!

I used to think that ghosts only can come out at midnight and if you weren't asleep by then, they would come and get you. I also thought that my covers were enough to stop them.

I thought the toilet flushed using some sort of suction power. I thought if I stood too close to the toilet when it flushed that I would get sucked down the hole...Needless to say, I would run (bolt, actually) out of the bathroom after I flushed until I entered boarding school...Seriously.

I believed that Christ was crucified every year in time for Easter and would, every year, resurrect three days later.Church service was really confusing because I could not understand why they kept killing Jesus and then mourning his loss.



So much more that I can't remember ...lol...Little me.....Don't just read . Drop your own Childhood misconception too...I need a good laugh!!!

My Easter

Easter! Easter!! Easter!!!

When I checked my schedule last week , I was kind of thinking how I was going to use 4 whole days . But here it is all gone, and back to school like it never was there.

I enjoyed this break one way or the other. Though I ran low on cash I kept pushing on :) . But the most important thing is that I had the best Easter Sunday so far, I am positive I danced my legs off(Never mind I am still standing).

Many things are actually falling into place(I found my long lost green shirt!! glad to know it wasn't stolen or eaten). I just have a good feeling about so many things. God has been absolutely good.

There is one thing I sure ain't happy about...MY FRIDAYS!!! HOW COULD THEY? .It was a "ME DAY" but they probably wouldn't understand. How am I suppose to go two whole months with no lecture free day? And so much Pharmacology!!! I am not going to loose it.

Ok...Time to prepare for a new school week ,I am keeping my fingers crossed and hoping I can make it through 'cause all work and no play makes Dekky a :( girl.




Bad days


Bad days happen to the best of us. Days where you just wake up in a really bad mood. Where something (or nothing) has made you angry, sad, frustrated, disappointed, whatever. Days where you know up front that “GURL", this is it.

You still have to get up and go to school, but before you even get there, you’re already seething inside. You try to do your school work but somehow people have conspired to call you and complain on the same day – though you have no idea how they coordinated that little feat.

Everything your friends say to you sounds incredibly stupid. Everyone seems out to annoy you. The next person to open his mouth is likely to get his head ripped clean off.Not much fun, huh? Sometimes I wish I can do something about it.

Yeah I am having one of those bad days,the only thing that made me not loose it is the thought of the good things I appreciated yesterday, where I wasn't as annoyed. I’ve been in a bad mood before. It passed. So will this one. It’s no big deal.




A Good Woman


I have heard my guy friends talk about how they can't find a good woman. The truth is, they are not looking in the right places and they are not being true to themselves. A relationship is a "give and take" situation. You have to think about what you are willing to give and what you want out of a relationship to make it work. As much as I hate to say it.... a lot of times what you see is what you get. This is true with guys and women. If you are a guy who likes big fake boobs and bleached blond hair, that may the extent of what you get. Remember, keeping your woman augmented is not cheap, so if you can afford to keep a nipped, tucked, and chiseled woman by your side, I say go for it. If you are looking for a woman who will love you, be loyal, and stand by you through thick and thin, then continue reading.

First of all, getting laid and finding a good girlfriend are two different things. If you go to a bar, find the drunkest, hottest chick in the place, this is probably not going to be your soul-mate. I know it sounds simple, but simplicity is the essence of truth. I have a few bullet points for you guys.

* First of all, be yourself. Don't use your "phone voice". Don't try to sell yourself. Women can see right past that. Don't tell her your life story in the first ten minutes of conversation. These things aren't natural and seem really un-natural. Now, don't go overboard and start farting and scratching yourself either. I am sure I didn't have to mention that last part, but you never know. I guess the most important thing I have to say in this bullet is for you not to try to sound sincere. If you are making an effort to sound sincere, you do not sound sincere.
* Don't boast! This is the biggest turn off in the world. If you drive an Aston Martin, don't walk up and tell the woman you drive an Aston Martin. That is the lamest thing in the world. It seems desperate. Don't tell her all of the prospects you have lined up. The more you boast, the more she thinks you probably live in your mom's basement.
* Don't lie! If you plan on spending any more time with this woman, please be a honest as possible. Lies, even small ones, destroy relationships. Don't tell her you have a house in the Hamptons if you don't. She may expect you to take her there one day. If she finds out you lied, about anything, she will wonder how many lies you have told her and if she even knows you, at all.
* If you are looking for an adult relationship. Dress like an adult. I don't mean when you are sitting around your house, or on a camping trip. I mean when you go out and actively seek woman with whom to have a relationship, dress the part. Leave the baseball cap out of the equation, unless you are playing baseball. I am not saying you should dress like you are going to a job interview either. This is basic stuff guys, but don't underestimate its effectiveness.
* Be proactive! If you are religious, you just might find a good woman in church. If you are a bookworm, you may find her at Barnes and Noble. Be on the lookout. If you like to hike, sign up for survivalist training. You may find the woman of your dreams in the great outdoors. Walk up to the woman and ask her name. Tell her your name. You don't need a pity come on. Remember keep it simple.

Finding a good girlfriend is a great challenge with great rewards. If you want a woman to love you for who you are, then let her know who you are. Treat her with respect and dignity, and she will show you the same. Don't become overly smitten with her looks, because looks fade. Don't look past faults she may have either. If she seems a little crazy, or angry, don't write it off. You don't need a nutcase on your hands.

I wish you well on your journey. I hope that all of you good guys out there, find the good woman you are looking for and you deserve. Remember to be true to yourself. You will find the one that loves you for you. Just remember that respect goes a long way.

Updates

Here are the past few weeks updates about me:

1. I have been thinking a lot lately and ironically I cannot place a finger to the source of my worry(Sounds bad I know).
2.I spent valentines day in church(Way cool).Spent the rest of it studying for physiology(Not cool at all).
2.Every night after my prayers,I think of how much i miss my sweetheart and it hurts so bad.
3.I kind of feel old. Yes at 22+ I am old but is feeling it such a good idea. I take things i wouldn't take 2years ago and ignore things I would always do then.Some will call it maturity but I ask my self why do I miss some of those things so so much.
4.I am finally getting some online guitar lessons,sounds funny watching someone on youtube play and teach me guitar.He doesn't even know my name.
5.I want to do something nice for my bff and I hope I will finally get to do it.
6.I finally learnt to sculpt a model of the teeth ,I am So excited about that.
7.I don't know why I feel as if I am going to get engaged soon..Sounds scary..What a thought!!!
8.I baked my first cookies(turned out bitter,thanks to too much baking soda).The second set tasted like a mixture of cake and biscuit,not too bad for starters.
9.I went E bay-fasting for a while(Good at least I know i ain't a shopaholic).
10.I succeeded in getting over my addiction with facebook,thanks to so much work i am into.
11.I suddenly realize there is nothing more complimentary with poetry than art.I am bringing back my drawing talent...I wonder where it went to...
12.I am giving up on ever expecting change from people.They will eventually only do it when they wish to.
13.I made a decision to shy away from all sorts of argument, somethings are not just worth it.
I guess those are just the few things for now,hoping for more interesting things in this coming week.Believe me my fingers are crossed.

MOTHER NATURE OR A MAGICAL AURA?






MOTHER NATURE OR A MAGICAL AURA?

Rays of light burning its foes
Western meadowlark chirping
hauntingly mysterious echoes
single small dew drops pennies
fluttering beauty in the swamps
Is it mother nature or a magical aura?

Astounding wonder veiled by lust forest
Waves awakening seas of quick silver
Fragrance warning of meandering rivers
Wind carved cliffs and capricious fairies
Captured in state of crepuscular gloom
Is it mother nature or a magical aura?

Moon aroused in silhouette glamour
Towering trees with silver gleam
Owls chanting unknown words to the night
Mystical sounds like gypsies in firelight
Wind whips across the stormy skies
Is it mother nature or a magical aura?

Air is calm as breathe in nature
Shimmering mirage across the woods
Sweet melody shielding the danger
Razor shape blades of grass dancing
Metal mountains with endless top
Is it mother nature or a magical aura?

Like boundless expanse of worlds
Each different in time and distance
Magic replaces the energy within
Nature harmonizes its primal power
Making bonds with lands and beyond
Is it mother nature or magical aura

Adventures of three teenage girls:Game Plan

Hard Saturday sunlight streamed into my bedroom.Even though it was past daybreak,I couldn't bring myself to stand up from my warm nice bed.Dully I looked outside,the sun gave the world a little brightness that contrasted with my mood.All i could think about was Harmony.

"Debbie! you have a phone call" My little sister's shout shattered my thoughts

"I am picking it now,and get off the other line" I screamed in return.

My little sister was fond of eavesdropping on my calls and it sure annoys me sometimes,but that was hardly the most of my worries now.

"Hello,Debbie on the line"

"Hey Deb,it's me how are you?"

There was only one person who called me Deb.My stomach fluttered.

"Mike is that you?" trying not too sound excited.

His voice sounding scrupulous as usual " Is Titi there? I need to talk her urgently,she isn't picking her phone,so i thought she might be with you"

My heart was crushed.Did I actually think he was calling to speak to me?

"No she isn't" I said hiding the pain in my voice.

"Ok,then thanks anyway.Its nice hearing your voice again Deb" He said hesitantly.

"You too" I said my heart leaping a little.

Dropping the phone my thoughts strayed to Mike.The first time I met him was on Titi's 16th birthday get together.He was so charming that i fell for him immediately and when we got talking I realized his charms goes way beyond the cute handsome face.Couple of months later he asked me out,but i turned him down because i felt i was too young to start a relationship at 15+.I really did like him and was hoping he would be my boyfriend when i turned 18.I was naive,because my 18th birthday is 2months away and Mike has a girlfriend now.

Putting the past aside I went into the bathroom to take a cold shower,considering the burning heat that wouldn't just stop.Thanks to global warming.
Couple of minutes later wearing a green top with my best jeans,I took a stroll towards Titi's house.We were to meet there to analyze the game plan.

It was a while before i reached Titi's house.I wasn't excited as usual.I hate getting back at someone,it just made no sense to me but i was into this and i had a very bad feeling about it.

I was about to knock when the door opened.

"You are always late,you need to set your priorities straight" Titi said

I looked backwards to see if she was expecting someone else before i muttered angrily "I am just 5 mins late,and that was because i walked down here and by the way where you waiting at he door just to tell me that."

"Whatever" she said

"Did Mike get hold of you,he called my house and wanted to speak with you" I said feigning disinterest.

She looked at me,twisting an eyebrow up "Strange, I saw Mike this morning and he said nothing of such"

I am not lying though,I got over him if that's what you are thinking"I said reassuringly

"I smell a rat though and just so you know.A girl never gets over her first crush" with hands softly placed over her heart.

"How can you even tell,Miss I don't want to fall in love.You have no idea about what you just said" I said dramatically

Giving up on the show Titi said "Never mind".

We went upstairs to Titi's cozy purple room,We have always wondered why she chose the color since she had no best color.One of the things i liked about Titi was that she was a simple rich girl,she bought because she needed and not because she knew she could afford all. Titi made everyone around her feel needed even though her parents were rich ,she was never proud.

Harmony was sitting on the light violet rug,she smiled at me.That wasn't enough to hide the dark rings around her eyes.She was crying all night I thought to my self.

"Ok let's get straight to the point" I announced tightly

"I told my Mum,She was furious.She called the school and the principal said I could stay but I would be on probation" She moved her shoulders in what could be called a bored shrug.

"Good News which means we have less to prove and more to revenge" Titi said

"Plan A we set her up,we get contraband's and sneak it into her bag,she will get caught while trying to pass hostel check " She laughs mysteriously.

"And you think that is funny,She could get suspended or something " I said with emphasis

"Then we are even" Harmony retorted

"Ok ok,but are you girls actually sure she was the one that stole the diamonds and put it in Harmony's bag or wh-what if Harmony just had some other enemies" I said nervously.

"I have told you Debbie,I heard when she told her cliques that she would do anything to get Harmony out of this school.Don't you get it she sees Harmony as a competition,both in class and with Jason.She is an evil witch" Titi said raising her hands with anger"

Shaking her head with disgust Harmony asked "are you in or you are out"

"Ok,I am in.I could use a little fun now and then I guess." I said reluctantly"
Looking at both Harmony and Titi.I knew I could not find a reason not to like this two girls.I guess that is why we ended up been best friends.Though I was very different from them.We always agreed on everything we disagree about and I love them either ways.

"Who will bell the cat" I asked.

"You" they both said together.

I couldn't have felt more jolted if they had slapped my face.
************************************************************************************

Adventures of three teenage girls.

I saw a tear roll down her cheek. I had never seen Harmony cry before,as she is the strongest amongst the three of us . I looked away while she brushed the offending tear off her cheek.I could not stand the tears as I am always the baby,crying at every tiny itch at my back.
Titi walked towards us,I could see from her face that she was bitter but like always she kept her pain to herself.

Harmony sat up and stammered "Wh-What are we going to do?I-I ha-ve to do something,it's just so unfair for her to set me up like that.I would have gladly left Jason for her if i knew it would come to this. "

"What do you mean ? Prove you are innocent of-course,It is not like we are going to get back at her.You know we have to take things cool now...I never did support you dating Jason in the first instance,he is so not your type" I said nervously.

"Now isn't the time to be sarcastic.Don't you understand?,they tampered with my future and reputation! My reputation!.She has just gone too far,how am I suppose to stand in front of the whole school to defend myself?. Only the two of you know the truth.Even Jason doesn't believe me and all this started because of him.Yes maybe I shouldn't have dated him in the first instance,but don't just stand there telling me to take things cool,what if it were to be you!!!" Harmony shouted into my brain.


Titi edged towards the windows with eyes firmly on me "Debbie,I dont care what you think or say this time around,She is right if getting back at Jola is what will stop this humiliation then we have got to do it.I am done been the good girl,thanks to you"


While i watched in despair,Harmony packed her bags preparing to leave.I wish I could console her more but there were no words left in my heart,it really touched me that it had to be her.If she couldn't find an excellent reason as to why the principals' precious diamonds were found in her bag,she would loose her scholarship.

Taking a deep breath,Now or never I said "Ok I agree with you girls on this ,but we need a strategy and I am more interested in proving harmony did not steal those diamonds.I am so positive that we can solve this amicably.Do we really have to get back at her?"

Titi taking the lead as usual said "Yes we have to,like harmony said she has just gone way too far and finally i can repay her back for all those cruel things she did to me or do we have to wait for her to get to you too?.

She smiled mysteriously "I have a big plan for her,a very big plan for our dear Jola".

*****************************************************************************
To be continued.....
Dear Readers,
Though this is a true life story,please note that some fictitious characters will be added along the line due to personal reasons.I do hope you enjoy it.

ORDINARY GIRL


ORDINARY GIRL

Cute long legs with strapped lacy shoes
Glamor wears and classy hairdos
Eloquent speech with flawless quotes
Elegant grace and so much banknotes
All they see is a damsel in pearls
All She wants to be is that ordinary girl

Miss perfection with expensive condos
Always found in exclusive talk shows
Every other girl wants her autograph
Signed on her most current photograph
All they see is a damsel in pearls
All she wants to be is that ordinary girl

She sneaks to an Italian bistro
Just to catch a hand of hot dog
Working with so much hardihood
Just to please the neighborhood
All they see is a damsel in pearls
All she wants to be is that ordinary girl

Wishing she could trade all this fame
To be with her girls even if it’s in shame
The world would never discern
How much her heart so burns
So she has to stop living In pearls
Just to become that ordinary girl

What grinds my gears


I am quite overexcited about getting over with these exams that i feel I might actually fall sick from hyper-excitation,and what is it with the new marking scores? Yes we all know you need a 50% to pass in med school...blah! blah! blah! But at least make us feel like we know something by starting the 50% from 6/12 instead of a 4/12...That 7/12 I had was meant to be a 9/12....I almost went nuts and that really really grinds my gears.But thats by the way...at the long run....I PASSED..mission accomplished.
Have you ever thought of those things that people do that really makes you feel like throwing them to another planet but you can't really figure out why they keep doing it and it? Yea that's what I want to talk about 'cause this things really grinds my gears.

Point 1: I hate it when the first thing a guy says to me before he says hi is 'I don't see a ring on your finger or why are you single?' That's just a lame line,it doesn't work for me,at least try a common courtesy.

Point 2:I hate it when strangers or acquaintance ring me on yahoo messenger without asking if can I answer their call.I find it absolutely rude especially when your status reads 'busy'

Point 3:I hate it when I answer so much question in class and my lecturer gives me the same mark as someone who doesn't know the topic for the class or when my classmates asks me for a question and i say I dont't know and the next thing he or she says is 'why don't you know,you should know it'...I feel like screaming out 'THEN YOU SHOULD KNOW IT TOO'

Point 4:I hate it when people see me and ask if we have cars in my country or if i live in a hut?..It makes me wonder if all their brain could process when they see a black is THE JUNGLE.

Point 5:I hate it when I wake up at 5AM and hot water refuses to flow...that definitely grinds my gear.

'What was she thinking'

'WHAT WAS SHE THINKING' Yea you heard me shout it.When will people start to think and come to the realization that fashion flop isn't only about the color wars or Vogue disaster.Its also about wearing the right clothe for the right weather.Ok,hear it is.I was walking to school this morning,all that was on my mind was trying not to get another fall on the slippery shiny road like I did from yesterday(Just so you know,that still hurts),oops what caught my attention was her classy red winter coat but looking further down what I saw made me smile and say to my self 'she definitely isn't wearing that' Obviously she was.... a bump shorts in a -10degrees,that's way off it.Little did I know that was just the tip of the iceberg,then it came to my awareness that she was wearing a winter boot with heels as thin as the a needle can be(Not exaggerating) and here I am thinking of how my low heel boots fit for a skating ground will survive the icy road.Just when I was about to process all this in my head,our humpty dumpty had a great fall(only that this humpty dumpty was a fashion princess).I don't know about you but that was a real fashion flop for me.She would still have looked way hot in a Gucci snow boots,her classy red coats and a D&G Jeans.That's what fashion is about staying 'Hot' in the winter and still looking hot,not breaking a leg or dying of pneumonia in the name of fashion...Some people still need to be 'FASHION CENSORED'.

My First Pay Job




Waking up from my bed this morning tired and worn out,all I could think about is my New Job.Yes I got a new customer care job(online jobs),good pay,funny team,flexible time and excellent boss.What more could I want.I feel so fly about it because finally I am experiencing work as a calling and also opportunity to serve others.
Let me give you 3 Important reasons why I love my new Job:
Reasonable pay!
Reasonable pay!
Reasonable pay!
After this 3 cores ,I really enjoy it because I get to learn many things through the training,believe me not until now I never knew what quick books was all about and Gil(My boss) is so funny he makes me laugh like 5times in 5minutes,eventually my cheeks ached from that.But not until I spoke to Eran (Boss 2) he was way Hyper-Funny(Imagine he even created me a password from a funny thing I said).I really think I am going to crack my ribs very soon from this two.
Again since I work from the convenience of my room,I can get a lunch break anytime,work in my pajamas and even talk to my friends on the phone while working.Sounds cool isn't it.Wait until you hear the coolest.I don't have to commute to and from work.I set my own time,there's a lot of problem solving involved with my job so my brain gets a pretty good workout every day(Oh I feel so brilliant).I am the queen at my Job.
Prior to the interview I got so nervous because I have never handled any customer care Job before,but on the D day after speaking with Gil everything melted off.He is a good trainer,I turned out greater than I expected..and now I am so into it I am thinking of a change in career-not like that can ever happen(Dentistry is my calling).
Finally,I am so happy i feel good about my job otherwise I would be thinking out strategies to quit(Yea i do that all the time,the strategies not the quitting).I am so glad I saved my self the question Could I quit my New Job?.

When I feel frustrated

Yea I know i promised to continue on what grinds my gears on facebook,but just as i was about to put an end to the long list a friend buzzed and asked me the strangest question for the week...'What do you do when you are frustrated?' Then i had second thoughts and decided to blog about what i do when I am frustrated.
Knowing me fully well,the first thing i do when I am frustrated is pray about the cause,but truthfully there are few times i find my self still very much agitated and frustrated after this.Then what do I do?
I turn to the people I trust the most and try to make them get that I am frustrated and I try as much as possible to make them understand my plight,that really works for me because after a while i just feel better talking to someone that cares.But what happens when even those people don't just get the reasons for your frustration after several explanations.That could make it Super-Frustrating.In this case I pick up my pen and my journal,create a world of my own and just jot down all the angers into words.For me there is nothing as refreshing as this.Eventually most of my best words are written at this point because I really get to express the innermost thing that no one could feel with me.Not that i can't write if I am not Frustrated(Don't get me wrong),in fact i write great words when I am happy.Writing at this point just clears my head up and my frustration just vanishes.
I think i might call it Self-Psychoanalyzing(If there is such word).Before I started that I used to take it out on anything living not minding how i hurt people because I am trying to rid off my frustrations,but after loosing few people or memories I think I can never get back I came to the realization that taking it out on a pillow would have even been a better choice than people.
Now I am glad I really can get angry,frustrated or even agitated without hurting those I love...I really think I am the best Self-Psychoanalyst!!!

How I Use Facebook Part 1

While i was thinking of my first blog topic,then it came to my thought to write about something I do often and how I do it.What came to my mind? Facebook!!! Everyone knows that FB is the in thing now, even the 80's are not getting left out,and I am definitely not an exception.
I would call myself a natural active facebook user,because I find myself kind of embedded to it,is that strange? No i dont think so because 80% of people within my age range are Facebookholic.The plane truth is we cant just help it.At least from experience that's what I think.
Getting to the point,what do I really do on Facebook that makes me glued to it even when I have exams.I am going to list 10 things I do on Facebook and 10 things I dont do.

10 THINGS I DO ON FACEBOOK
1. Make sure I update my status on a daily basis
2.Upload recent pictures
3.Stalk my friends(I mean Intimate friends!!!)
4.Take some silly quizzes,even when I know how silly some are.
5.Block People who tend to make me irate.
6.Make comments on Friends' walls,photos,posts.
7.Poke my family
8.Join groups i like
9.Sororittize
10.Surf Applications

10 THINGS I DON'T DO ON FACEBOOOK
1.Add people i dont know(Except for the games)
2.Post nonsense on friends' walls
3.Liking a particular person's status all the time(Even when i really like it).It makes it seem like I am stalking them,especially if they ain't my close friends.
4.Upload nude pictures
5.Tagging others on irrelevant posts,pictures or notes
6.Chat(I couldn't possibly do that even when i want to,I have over 1500 friends)
7.I don't post Personal secrets,Numbers,Emails.
8.I don't make tone deaf Status.
9.I dont abuse other people's power.
10.I don't flame unless the recipient deserves it.


Surely this could go on and on,but i will leave that for now.....Next time I would be discussing what grinds my gears on facebook.